Everyone has the feeling, You get trapped in your head at a crucial moment when you need to speak up. Maybe you think you’re not good enough for a job you really want to apply for. Or perhaps walking to the shop gives you anxiety. If you’re interested in learning how to get self confidence when you have none, then this guide is for you! However, you should be warned it’s not for the faint of heart.
First of all
Before you start to read the rest of this article you need to start developing one belief in your head. “It’s possible.” Rather than believing you are incapable of doing something, just start telling yourself “it’s possible.” Tell yourself this as much as you can. When you hear yourself speaking negatively, give yourself a gentle reminder” it’s possible.” Think about it whilst you’re drifting off to sleep. When you wake up in the morning put a sign up in front of your face telling yourself that “it’s possible.” Keep doing this until you believe that ANYTHING is POSSIBLE.
What’s possible? What is “it”? It’s anything you want it to be. Anything in your life you wish to accomplish is POSSIBLE for you, it may not be 100% guaranteed, or likely, or even probable. But it is POSSIBLE. You’ll be amazed at the actions your willing to take when you believe in your mind something is possible.
I recommend watching a motivational speaker call Les Brown. His words inspired me to believe everything is possible and if you listen to him, the same will happen for you.
How To Get Self Confidence When You Have None
What is Self Confidence?
The literal definition of self confidence is “a feeling of trust in one’s abilities, qualities, and judgement.” So to get self confidence you just need to trust your abilities, qualities, and judgements. A piece of cake right?
Abilities and judgment
If you want your judgement and abilities to be better there is ONE thing you need to do. You need to become competent in that area. Everyone has a confidence. I assume when you brush your teeth in the morning you are confident you can. How did you gain your confidence? Through getting competent at cleaning your teeth. Repetition every day. To gain self confidence in other areas of your life you just need to get competent there too.
So what is it that scares you? I used to be an incredibly shy guy. I have missed so many opportunities because I lacked self confidence in the past. My BIGGEST issue was talking to people. I used to be so bad everyone would sit on one side of the classroom and I’d sit on the other side ALONE. Guess how I overcame that limiting self confidence.
Repetition until I was competent. I literally threw myself into situations where I had to be confident. I moved countries, I took jobs that forced me to talk to people all day. At first, I hated it. I wanted to come home when I left. If it wasn’t for my friends I probably would have. But staying was the best decision I made.
You don’t have to move countries to get more self confidence. Whatever area of your life you want self confidence in you JUST need to repeat the action until it becomes second nature to you. If you lack self confidence about job interviews. Apply for as many as you can. Even ones you don’t want just to get your interviewing skills up. If talking to people is where your confidence is lacking. Go talk to 100 people or 1000 people. However many it takes until you’re completely competent.
The ONE way to get TRUE self confidence is to become competent. And the MORE competent you get in multiple scenarios the MORE confidence you’ll gain altogether.
Trust in one’s qualities
The more you start getting self confidence through being competent the more you will trust in your qualities. But in the meantime, you can still think of some qualities you DO have. Stop focusing on the negative traits you THINK you have. Lack of self confidence, nervousness, anxious etc. And think about your GREAT qualities, or qualities you can easily adopt. Generosity, helpfulness, and patience are just a few amazing qualities you have or can acquire easily.
And the more competent you become the more your other qualities will begin to shine. Humour, Talkativeness, and action-taking will all follow soon after!
Now You Know How To Get Self Confidence When You Have None
Are you ready? This is the quickest method on how to get self confidence when you have none. BUT it’s also the hardest. Are you prepared to make 100’s of mistakes for the life you deserve? If so then go out and start taking action. It’s hard but it’s rewarding. Keep a journal or make note of how far you’ve got in a week/month/year and you’ll be amazed at the difference.
Are you curious about the steps I took to gain self confidence? From moving to France to becoming a PR in Greece I wrote a short summary of what I did here. Remember If this seems a bit extreme to you, you can take smaller steps. Start talking to the cashiers when you shop, join a new club. go for a walk. It doesn’t matter what you do. JUST START DOING.