For so long I believed that life was something that happened to you. And maybe if you’re reading this you’ve just stumbled across this post and think the same thing. But I hope you haven’t and if you DO carry on reading you’ll find out how drastically you’re happiness can improve when you learn to build your life.
Why Should You Want To Build Your Life?
You Have A Victim Mentality
Do you have any of these thoughts in your head about life:
- Life happens TO you
- You’re not in control of your life.
- If something bad happens it must just be fate.
- Why bother trying to make something of your life, because you don’t really have any control
- You believe that other people are just more ‘fortunate’ than you are.
These thoughts are completely negative and completely untrue. If you want to build your life kick them to the curb forever. Because the real truth is right now you’re walking around with a victim mentality. Stop feeling victimized about the way your life is. You have in life exactly what you’ve put into life. Maybe something bad has happened to you. Or a string of bad things has happened to you. You could be going through the hardest part of your life. But the truth, the very bottom line is this:
‘Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.’ – Viktor Frankl
And when you make the CHOICE that your life deserves to be better than you are going to go out and make it better. Then you will see it starting to work in your favor.
And if you don’t know who Viktor Frankl is, he’s an AMAZING man who not only survived but thrived in the concentration camps during World War II by keeping his attitude correct and choosing how he was going to live his life with what had been given to him!
To Give You A Clear Foundation And Plan
When you have a clear, precise idea of what you want you can start to build on it. Choosing to build your life gives yourself a foundation to work on. Deciding that life is happening TO you, is the first step in taking the steps to change it. And once you have your foundation now you can start to build a plan for how you want your life to be. You stop being a tumbleweed blowing through the desert of life. You’ll begin to grow roots that go deep into the ground as you grow towards your goals and the life you want
Steps You Can Take To Build Your Life
Step 1a: Take Responsibility For Your Life
The first thing you need to do before anything else, (if you haven’t realized already) Is TAKE responsibility for yourself. If you’re over 21 and you’re reading this then your environment is the sole results of your actions in life. Whatever happened in your life is not as important as how you CHOSE to react to it.
Up until this moment, you may have been living in ignorance of this fact. And that’s fine. You can’t be blamed for not knowing what you don’t know. But from this moment onwards, whether you like it or not, you have NO excuse to not start taking responsibility for your life and your attitude towards it.
Step 1b: Empowerment – You’re Calling The Shots
If you don’t already you should start to feel empowered. You are the CEO of your life, you’re calling the shots. From this day forward you can CHOOSE to take your life in the direction you want it to go. So start making some positive calls in your life.
Think of the things that are going to start benefiting you and start moving towards them. Learning more and getting healthier are GREAT places to start.
Step 2: Removing The Negatives From Your Life
I don’t care what it is a tv show or a friend, if they’re not supporting you and helping you build your life (which you should also be doing for them) then you need to cut them out. It may only be temporary or it may be forever.
TV is easy to remove, but removing a friend is a lot harder. However, you have to understand if someone is constantly affecting your life in a negative way then they aren’t a good friend. If you tell your ‘friend’ you want to work on your dream instead of wasting your day and they don’t understand. Then they’re affecting your life in a negative way. I’m not saying remove all your friends. It IS important to socialize but make sure they understand that you ALSO need to spend time taking responsibility for your life and working on making it better!
And the hardest one of all. Removing the negative thoughts from your mind. They may have been there a lot longer than your friend and getting them out may be the hardest task you will face. But with the constant daily effort, you’ll begin to change them from negative to positive!
Step 3: Figure Out What You Want From Life
And start working towards it. This will normally turn up in your daydreams. For me, it was to never be tied to one job in one spot. I read a book called the 4 Hour Work Week and knew that I wanted to live a life where I wasn’t tied to one spot. And today we don’t have to. Everything has changed in the age of the internet. Whatever you want from your life you can have it. If you want to be rich now’s the best time ever to be rich. If you don’t care about money and just want to be free (like me) this IS possible for you! Just figure out what it is that you want!
Step 4: Take More Positive Actions
So now you’ve figured out what you want from life, no matter how crazy it may seem, start taking positive actions towards it. And remember the crazier your dream, the bigger the actions you’re going to have to take! Also the older you are the more drastic the actions are going to have to be.
In the book ‘The Millionaire Fastlane’ there’s one part where he talks about a meteor hurtling towards Earth. If you give the meteor a tiny nudge when it’s extremely far away it’s going to hurtle far away from Earth. However the closer that meteor gets to Earth, the bigger the push that will be needed to steer it off course. The same is true for your life, unfortunately. The older you are, the bigger the push you’re going to have to give if you want to see positive results in your life.
And like I said before you have NO excuse now not to make this push. You are in control of your life and if you CHOOSE not taking action in your life. It’s only YOU who can take the blame not your ‘circumstances’ when you have lived a life that you weren’t happy with.
Step 5: Building Your Routine
You have your destination, you’re aware of the positive actions you need to take in order to build your life. The next step is building a routine you can stick too. Routine is important because, unfortunately, willpower is finite. Having a routine you can stick to decreases the amount of willpower you need therefore making it easier to get done what needs to get done.
Think about your morning routine. Does it require an enormous amount of effort to get up and get showered or clean your teeth? Probably not, you do it automatically. And the best way to build a life that you want is to make the actions you need to take every day an automatic process!
Step 6: Constantly Educate Yourself
There are things that you don’t know right now that are going to change your life when you do know them! The more you educate yourself the more you’ll find these little veins of gold. When you’re not working on your ideal life. You should be learning about ways to improve it currently. As a rule of thumb, you want ‘80% Do & 20% New.’ What I mean by this is that you want to be working on building a life you want 80% of the time and learning information the other 20%.
Doing this will ensure that if you are hitting roadblocks it won’t be TOO long before you figure out what’s wrong and work around it!
What You’ll Begin To Notice
When you start to take control of your life you’ll notice something begin to happen. Your self-esteem will begin to skyrocket and your general satisfaction with life will be greater. This is because although you haven’t reached it yet. You’re well on the way to the goal you want AND not only this, you have something you’re shooting for. And given enough time you are bound to succeed at!
So make it your goal to build your life the way you want too! Instead of settling for a mediocre existence. The choice from this moment forward is all yours.